Heart trumps all—and the latest research may change how you think about morality, technology, and human progress. In this episode, psychologist and author Robert McGrath explores how people and societies change, and shares why he remains optimistic about humanity’s future. From the three capacities McGrath calls heart, mind, and will to the ways innovation can spark both conflict and compassion, this conversation connects psychology, history, evolution and moral development. It offers a fresh perspective on why societies change, why progress can face backlash, and what helps us build more caring, just, and resilient communities. Dr. Alexandra Miller Clark guides the conversation with curious questions about moral growth and human progress. Bob McGrath is a professor of psychology at Fairleigh Dickinson University. His new book, Bringing Fire: How Innovation Helps us Change and Makes us Fight, explores how innovation shapes morality, conflict, and human behavior. You'll discover: Why McGrath describes three key human capacities as heart, mind, and will How technologies like the printing press, television, and the internet can accelerate social change while also prompting temporary backlash What historical trends in violence can tell us about human progress What the histories of the slave trade and indigenous dispossession reveal about lasting moral and economic harm How memory reconsolidation may help us become more flexible and less certain that we are always right Why stories can persuade differently from statistics—and why both matter The conversation also explores the role of social influencers, the Book of Ruth as a model for every day kindness in relationships and the importance of self-control. McGrath makes the case that human progress is not always linear though we continue to improve. This show was created with love. The following are seven ways you can support and encourage my efforts to create new content, from easiest to hardest: Press “follow” on the podcast Press “follow” on YouTube @alexandramillerclark Share a helpful podcast episode with a friend Share a helpful YouTube episode with a friend Leave the podcast a rating on iTunes Leave the YouTube a rating on iTunes Buy me a coffee: buymeacoffee.com/dralexandra

What does it take to stop painful family patterns from being passed on? Dr. Alexandra Miller Clark explores the idea of “bearing the pain” and how facing emotional discomfort can help interrupt intergenerational anger, abuse, and dysfunction. Using a psychological family tree called a genogram (can be seen on the video version), Dr. Alexandra explains how conflict and unhealthy reactions can pass through families over generations. She shares why change can mean resisting an automatic response—even when choosing a healthier one feels uncomfortable.In this episode, you’ll discover: How family patterns can go back 10 generations or more How “bearing the pain” can help you change your continuation of that pattern Why “less is more” can make a difference during conflict How Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) encourages facing emotions and acting according to your values How choosing not to pass pain forward can help build a legacy of love Dr. Alexandra shares insights from forgiveness therapy, Robert Enright, and Stephen Hayes to explore how facing difficult feelings can build resilience and help you act in line with what matters most.If you’re ready to respond differently in conflict, break old patterns, or create a healthier future for your family, this episode offers a compassionate place to begin. Timestamps 00:00 - Family patterns can repeat for generations 01:03 - How anger and pain get passed down 02:03 - The meaning of “bearing the pain” 02:43 - Relationship conflict and the “less is more” approach 04:07 - Why change hurts even when it is good 05:05 - Stopping dysfunctional patterns to leave a legacy of love 06:40 - Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy to face emotions 07:57 - Robert Enright on pain, strength, and self-worth 09:01 - Why thought stopping fails and facing emotions helps 10:27 - Noticing emotional pain without acting automatically 10:57 - Choosing help and change for the good of the family This show was created with love. The following are seven ways you can support and encourage my efforts to create new content, from easiest to hardest: Press “follow” on the podcast Press “follow” on YouTube @alexandramillerclark Share a helpful podcast episode with a friend Share a helpful YouTube episode with a friend Leave the podcast a rating on iTunes Leave the YouTube a rating on iTunes Buy me a coffee: buymeacoffee.com/dralexandra

The way parents talk about each other in front of their children can quietly affect the child’s emotional health, well-being, and relationship with both parents. In this episode, Dr. Alexandra explores the “boomerang effect” and explains why criticizing or putting down a spouse, partner, or ex-partner can ultimately damage the relationship between the criticizing parent and their child. Drawing on a 2018 study of nearly 1,000 young adults, Dr. Alexandra explains what researchers found about parental denigration—the act of speaking negatively about one parent to the child. The research connects greater conflict between parents with more depressive symptoms in children, greater emotional pain, and lower satisfaction with life. These findings applied to both married and divorced families. You’ll discover: How children may become less close to the parent who is doing the criticizing. How conflict between parents is associated with depressive symptoms in their children How parental conflict can contribute to lower life satisfaction for children How children may experience emotional pain even when they seem to agree with one parent How children blame the attacking parent for the divorce How body language, facial expressions, and private conversations within earshot can affect children How to interrupt negative communication patterns, even when they have continued for generations Dr. Alexandra also speaks compassionately to parents who feel hurt, resentful, or unjustly treated. She explains why defending yourself by attacking the other parent can continue the cycle, and why changing these patterns may require support from a therapist, psychologist, or from your faith community.If you are a parent, stepparent, co-parent, or part of a divorced family, this episode offers research, perspective, and hope. The central message is simple: when children are exposed to one parent putting down the other, the emotional harm can affect the child—and eventually boomerang back into the relationship with the criticizing parent. PS from Dr. Alexandra: I'm only human - in the recording I accidentally referred to the study as 2020, but it is 2018 in Family Relations. Also note: I have found in my 20+ years of private practice that the criticism by one parent of the other may "work" short term but in the long term, especially as they reach adulthood, kids will flip and have greater resentment for the parent who does the attacking. Ideally, both parents will stay mindful and refrain from attack - stay tuned for the next episode on one strategy to stop. Chapters 00:00 Introduction to the boomerang effect and parental denigration 00:32 Research overview: Effects of parental denigration on young adults 01:47 Impact on child-parent closeness and emotional well-being 03:00 Divorce, blame, and the long-term effects of conflict 04:00 Why avoiding negative talk benefits both parents and children 04:57 Practical advice for parents: Be mindful of what you say 05:56 The importance of body language and overall communication 07:11 Changing ingrained family habits and seeking support This show was created with love. The following are seven ways you can support and encourage my efforts to create new content, from easiest to hardest: Press “follow” on the podcast Press “follow” on YouTube @alexandramillerclark Share a helpful podcast episode with a friend Share a helpful YouTube episode with a friend Leave the podcast a rating on iTunes Leave the YouTube a rating on iTunes Buy me a coffee: buymeacoffee.com/dralexandra

If you have adult ADHD I encourage you to choose and apply a treatment strategy - whether it is through pharmaceuticals or through cognitive behavioral exercises. To learn helpful details about adult ADHD listen to the "Adult ADHD" episode on the Psychology America with Dr. Alexandra podcast: https://www.buzzsprout.com/150092/9965252

This video introduces the podcast entitled "On Hair" in Psychology America with Dr. Alexandra which can be found wherever you listen to your podcasts. Hair and its impact on self esteem is an area that has *not* been researched very much in psychology, but which I think is worthy of a conversation. At the release of this video 12 states have passed laws to ban race based hair discrimination and last month the US House of Representatives passed federal legislation (the “CROWN Act”) that bans race based hair discrimination, such as telling folks they can’t wear braids or cornrows because it looks “unprofessional.” I like to dedicate each of these shows to a non-profit and today’s show is dedicated to The International Forgiveness Institute. Learn all about research that supports the mental and physical health benefits of forgiveness by visiting internationalforgiveness.com. #crownact #psychology #hairstyle #hairstyle #inclusion

Psychology America with Dr. Alexandra podcast. Find the podcast version of this video on iTunes, Spotify, Stitcher, Google Play or click: https://www.buzzsprout.com/150092/episodes/774351-untitled-episode We explored the following profound and often perplexing questions: Why forgive? How does psychology define forgiveness and how do Judaism, Christianity and Islam see forgiveness? Does forgiving mean we are pardoning bad behavior? Do you need the offender to participate if you want to forgive? What steps can we take to forgive and how do we do it? Guests for this episode bring the perspectives of Judaism, Islam and Christianity to the topic. Rabbi Mendel Dubov serves as faculty at the Rabbinical College of America in Morristown, NJ, USA and as Director of Chabad in Sussex County, NJ. Saifulla Chaudahry serves as Propagation Secretary for Ahmadiyya Muslim Community of North Jersey. Pastor Michael Bos, Ph.D. serves as the Senior Minister of Marble Collegiate Church of New York City and is the President of the Collegiate Churches of New York. Dr. Bos established the first interfaith religious diplomacy center on the Arabian Peninsula, and received the U.S. Ambassador’s Award for Community Service. Psychology studies have found that when people forgive it decreases anxiety, depression and obsessive thinking about the offender. Multiple studies have also found that forgiveness improves mood, psychological health and the quality of one’s relationships overall. To read & explore further about forgiveness , may I suggest starting with a search of psychology studies by Robert Enright and Richard Fitzgibbons. I hope you will enjoy and learn from this very special episode!

In our second NJPA Leadership Academy meeting, the group learned about storytelling as a persuasive tool to inspire others to action.  We also enjoyed guest Dr. Anastasia Bullock, NJPA President, who brought a leadership case example for the cohort to ponder and discuss.  Thank you Dr. Stacey Zaremba, licensed psychologist and teacher for 24 years, for sharing your story in this video with Dr. Alexandra Miller Clark, Chair of the NJPA Leadership Academy.

The New Jersey Psychological Association (NJPA) Leadership Academy held their first session in April 2026 on the topic of "Leader as Servant." Each member of the cohort came prepared with one story about this topic. Thank you Vanessa Gamarra, psychology doctoral student at Kean University, for sharing your story of servant leadership with the larger audience through this video. This video features Vanessa and Dr. Alexandra Miller Clark, who is serving as Chair of the NJPA Leadership Academy.